11:11 pt.2As I approached your house, I passed the alleyway in to which you dragged me, the first night we made this walk together. You laughed wildly and pulled me by my wrist, we almost fell into it, our hands finding each other’s, and our fingers linking as you pushed me up against the wall and kissed me for what felt like hours. I felt a pang of sadness when I realised I would probably never kiss you again, but I continued to walk the 50 yards to house, unfased.11:11 pt.2
All the lights were off but one, in your living room the bulb burned as bright as the sun it seemed, the light almost blinding me as I looked towards it. I saw you there,
11:11 pt.1Sometimes things are exactly how they seem, and other times they appear to masquerade themselves as something else. I felt this most plainly at 8pm yesterday evening. I pulled my Harrington jacket over my shoulders and grabbed my keys from the desk, as I turned to the door I saw a photo of you flash across the screen of Rosie’s computer. Smiling and tanned on your parents front porch in Italy. In that moment I remembered everything. Having kept away for so many months I’d managed to avoid this feeling, but your face looking back at me hit me like a blow to the head.11:11 pt.1
I stood rooted to the spot in our living room, my eyes
Storm Clouds.those days in the summer, when it was so hot you could barely move, but the storm clouds gathered above your head and the sky darkened in early afternoon. Those days you waited and prayed for the rain because the air seemed so heavy that it might just crush you, or become so thick that it was like inhaling smoke with each breath you took. It was on those days that we moved with such pace and fear, and performed each mundane or routine task with a sense of panicked urgency. Those days in the city, when the the buildings seemed to be looming over you, the clouds so low they almost seemed part of them. Those, hot, hot days, that burnt your skinStorm Clouds.
This is August.This is august, and I wake up at half past three to pouring rain hammering down upon the roof. the cat is asleep by my feet, because he hates the rain and I enjoy the gentle sound of his purring as I adjust my eyes to the dark. I wake expecting to find your head on my shoulder and your arm draped protectively over my stomach; instead the bed is empty.This is August.
Its times like this when I miss you most. Its not a painful way to miss someone, I can be thankful for that. It's not a dull ache; I don't miss you when I'm lonely, or when I'm sad, just in the moments when I subconsciously expect you to be there. I don't miss you when I wake up in
I Promise YouI Promise YouI Promise You
I know everyday gets harder And every confrontation seems longer But I’m betting it will make you stronger Stronger than you’ve ever imagined I promise this won’t be a dead end
Don’t forget, I’ll be there with you all the way During those times with a bright blue sky Or even when it’s the dullest grey
I know you’ll make it higher Than the sun could ever hope I’ll hold your hand while we walk this tight rope And I’ll hold your heart close Through the rains and the snow
Don’t forget, I’ll be there with you all the way &n
as you sleepi hate the slow change in mood.as you sleep
i mean, it's like this unavoidable fate and it happens when you're closing your eyes for a quick count to ten. but i hate it so much and i can't keep it away. and i swear i've been looking for a cure, but there's nothing on this end that keeps the phone from being one sided when i'm speaking.
and i want to do things right, but no one ever told me how. like a set of directions, or a really poorly drawn map.
on top of that, i keep this close watch on the clock. good morning? maybe in a few hours, i'll be awake and taking medicine for the day, and screening phone calls. but i
contact! contact!
--
"You've got more brains than all of us together even if-"
"Even if I am twisted and warped I am smarter then all of you. And someday I will prove it! Someday you-with all your strength and charm-all of you, will call me master!"-Tanis and Raistlin
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